The court is set to decide it next month. Fingers crossed! What do you think?
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Longtermlove | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
It would be a good decision if it happens. It would prevent guys remaining alone in life or marrying girl just for the sake of it and spoiling their life,. Gays, bi will have options as well acceptance |
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vihit2345 | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
Really rooting for it to be legalised next month without delays! It did not stop me from getting married but I know there are many others who would like to but cannot currently (I am still recognised as “Single” in India despite legally marrying my husband and being considered married in the US, so weird that legality of my relationship changes over a 14 hour flight)
This law will encourage so many to come out and create something amazing together without having to leave India to have it all! |
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Bicurious_28 | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
Wondering if legalizing marriage will also see a rise in committed, monogamous relationships among LGBT people 😛
So many people who claim to be "committed", "partnered", etc, but yet they are on dating sites hunting for a different partner every week. (This makes me wonder whether true love among our community exists at all. Even if it does, it's disproportionately less).
This may sound rude but it's the harsh reality. |
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Bicurious_28 | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
*legalizing gay marriage |
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decentbottom | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
How many of you think this will work?
How many would get married? And how many would stay loyal to their spouse? |
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decentbottom | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
Although welcoming, therz a lot of work to be done, both by the community, as well as the society... |
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Twinklyours | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
Not a significant movement ....
About 90 Lakh people indulge in gay ***, of these
About 15 Lakh people are not in straight marriages,
About 3 Lakh people will stay single
About 2 Lakh people are are actually bisexual
About 0.5 Lakh people will come out as gay
About 5 thousand people will enter into a committed gay relationship
Correct me if I'm wrong!
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vihit2345 | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
Loyalty is defined by two partners in a relationship and I think work on the society/community is definite Needed but a law would enable folks that already live for themselves and by their rules.
When both partners in a relationship are open, it is often frowned upon.but is it cheating if the other person knows? I think just assuming things, is never good. Loyalty is defined by people in the relationship and not by society. But i think everyone in India has been given a handbook full of married life guidelines(which I totally see being followed all the time lol - people who have taken a different stance than mine have also messaged me asking for my private picture password - that is the society we live in)!
But then again every once in a while you come to a dead-end where you know society can not be taught everything and you just move on.
I hope the law come to life and gives what ever 0.01% lgbtqia population the right to live together LEGALLY (which many of you won’t realise but can be crucial with life insurance and other legalities, you can create something together but when one is gone it won’t be a second before people legally challenge your “partner” for it, this law would give you security if you even need it) |
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PrinceofPersia | Posted On Oct 25, 2021
@vhit2345 -I just wish there was a LIKE button for your post. I read so many emotional posts about being trapped in a marriage, what counts as being Gay or Bi etc. But yours is the most logical and sensible one that I have read in a long time. Yes India needs to take the next big step viz. to legalize gay marriages but I think we might have to wait it out for much longer. We will slowly follow once most western nations make it a norm, just like to took us about 50 years to decriminalize homosexuality after the British.
The LGBT population (including people who are bi-curious) seems to be rapidly growing and I would easily peg it at 20% (am almost sure). A law will definitely protect the domestic rights even if they recognize civil partnerships. In companies like Google and Microsoft even in a country like India, they allow you to define your same *** partner as your beneficiary but like you mention if someone challenges in the court of law it won't hold good. |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
Vihit2345.
I am not hopeful of same *** marriages getting legalized so soon. The Twitter handle livelaw provides details of hearings in court and public prosecutor's arugments, indicating the govt's and ruling party's views certainly don't raise any hope. When 377 was read down, they asked the court to limit itself to decriminalization of same *** acts. On a previous case, they said nobody is dying for same *** marriage. Yesterday's arguments were no different.
It is going to be a long battle. |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
I meant to give +1 to vihit2345 in my above comment. |
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aayaan6nine | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@twinklyours so you seem to be supporting the government by declaring your own community as a miniscule minority.
In India I believe the LGBTQ numbers and statistics is hard to guage as many still remain unaware and closeted. A move like this and at least a few of us actually getting married will only increase the awareness and understanding for others. More importantly it will give hope to some. It's not just about how many of us want it. It's a basic right that I want to marry someone I love and obviously the financial and other rights that come with it for inheritance etc. It's not easy but it has to start.
The other topic some are talking about is loyalty. I think it is same for heterosexual relationships. If you truly love someone you will stay loyal period. The problem is not many ppl are open in the community due to various reasons. Your probability of finding the right person for you becomes less. There could be 10% LGBTQ population on the whole but who are actually available are just 0.1%. It's not the fault of the community but just an outcome of repression as many hesitate to live the way they want and still think about how it will be perceived. I am going to stay hopeful for our community irrespective. |
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Bicurious_28 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@decentbottom: Very well said 👌🏻 Not many people like the idea of loyalty or monogamous relationships (particularly in our LGBTQ community)-- they will try to sugarcoat it by calling it an open marriage, open relationship and God knows what not!
Dunno what's the use of calling it a loyal relationship in the first place. Loyalty is loyalty, and *** around IS *** around! Period.
@aayaan6nine: Interesting points 👍🏻 |
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Bicurious_28 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
To say that the basic core definition of loyalty can change according to the whims & fancies of people is itself nothing but an excuse to hit the bed with others!! |
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TopInAndheri | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@Twinklyours, any sources for the numbers you have mentioned? Or did you pull these out of your ***? I bet it is the latter.
Just because you are a *** and not looking for a relationship doesn't mean everyone is like you. There is nothing wrong in not wanting relationships or wanting *** but that does not mean that everyone is like that. You see the entire world as *** hungry because you are meeting guys on platforms who are looking for the same thing as you. Does that mean there are no people who want monogamous relationships? Absolutely not! There is a whole different world out there so stop being an ignorant frog in a well and explore the ocean.
Sure, the society may seem like homophobic but in my opinion most people are not bothered about same *** relationships either way. The homophobes are typically the loud miniscule minority that's why it feels like our entire society is homophobic but I wouldn't be too bothered these homophobes. What I would be bothered about are the extreme right-wing section which is in power and are opposed to gay marriage based on religious or "our traditions" perspective. They have the power to derail the progress we have made as well as shaping public opinion. Thankfully, these people do not voice their opinion loudly because it makes them look very bad on the world stage. I hope you know who I mean. Thankfully, being homophobic is not looked on kindly by the developed world and India certainly cares about that part of the world. I believe that is why the current government didn't oppose legalizing gay *** vehemently. I am hoping the same happens with gay marriages but I'm not very optimistic.
What will legalizing gay marriage do? It will tell those section of the society who are homophobic that they are wrong and to the people who haven't formed an opinion on this topic it says that it is not wrong to be gay and to be married to a person of the same ***. It will make a big difference in changing the society and normalizing gay relationships. It will be a big catalyst in making the country more open to these relationships. |
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Twinklyours | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@aayaan: What I meant is that we are not a significant enough group of voters to influence this matter positively. Whether we are 1% or 20%. We also don't raise our voices in support in public. |
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Edward75 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
I've really enjoyed reading the comments here today. Shows a lot of maturity and knowledge amongst the lot. I'm glad that the future seems so much better then when I was growing up. 🙏 |
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Twinklyours | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@topin: I sense your frustration and feel for you too. But this is the state of affairs as I know it. As for what I do ... it's nothing unheard of in our community. Wishing you good times bro ! |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
Justice and equality before law is meant for all. It has got nothing to do with numbers or majority. |
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tasteme2021 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
In India Society rule will speak then LAW
Even law Says :
1.Cleared about 377 Still cop threading ppl for GAY relationship ,BCZ Society not ready to accept
2. law Say Equal Right to Women in Asset ,Still its debating
3. law says 21 yr is right age for women get marriage but....
in many ... law say some what but..
Indian Society need next Generation to accept the above lawa
Impossible thing - If i wish to come to my parents as GAY i should act like As STRAIGHT for this SOCIETY, ...may i can accept if my son come out ......
So society need next generation to accept the law
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shapeoflove | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
Legalisation of gay marriage still seems a bit difficult, especially under the regime of the current conservative government. So, not very hopeful regarding the next month judgement but i'm hopeful for such a law to be made sooner than later.
IMO marriage is a necessary right that should be provided to every individual irrespective of their sexuality or gender. Now, a lot of people complain about the lack of stability in gay relationships. But at the same time we fail to acknowledge the fact that marriage is an important factor that brings a sense of responsibility and a much needed stabilty in any relationship. And the fact that we are deprived of such basic rights and support system is extremely frustrating and sad at the same time.
A whole structure has been developed for the heterosexual people that not only gives all the rights but also provides a much needed support system( family, society and the law) for their relationship to blossom. Even then, we witness a lot of unsuccessful relationships happening in the heterosexual community. We see people cheating on their spouses and marriage getting broken on daily basis. Then, how can we expect majority number of people to lead a successful and stable relationship in our community deprived of even basic rights like marriage? |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@tasteme, most laws involving social reform were opposed by a section of society, and those who claim they speak for the society. But lawmakers and courts have to think about what is right and just, rather than what the society thinks or wants. At least this was so till a few years ago , in most cases.
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Raj2000 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
Gay marriage is not "Recognized" in India... As far as I remember it is Not illegal too...
If 2 individuals can get married i.e Male-Male or Female-Female or TG, etc.... it won't be considered as a marriage my law. You need to take special permission from court if you face any threat only then court can recognize Gay marriage.
Someday Gay marriage will be recognized too by law for sure.
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ram2001 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
If such marriages legalise then all std and gay hunting displeasure issues resolved. For lgbt welfare it is needed to protect ftom hiv etc |
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ram2001 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
As per global trends 8 to 10 % population of any country is lgbt. In that ration 15 to 20 crore lgbt population stay in india. But govt statistics show only 1o to 20 lacs which is quite incorrect. This large population have to show identity and fight unitedly to legalise our identity. |
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Nu-Man | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
Why do u want government to legalize your marriage.
Stop imitating the straights.
You can still live with your partner without getting married.
But the problem is finding that one guy.
Gays are independent and feel do not need social security like in straight marriages. |
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kissmylips | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
@Nu-Man there are a lot of benefits when a relationship is recognised by the state. For starters it provides a strong legal support for gay couples which protects then against violence and blackmail. Recognition helps your partner get your property if anything happens to you untimely. There will be adoption possibilities too. Forget about the gays, legalising same *** marriages can provide solid support to lesbian women and lesbian couples and trans people, who are almost in all cases subjected to grave violence by their own families.
Legalising same *** marriages can encourage many closeted people to look for partners in a more organised manner and settle down. Oh it can bring in a host of changes in many people's lives once the government backs them.
Beyond everything gay people won't have to disguise their relationships as friends n cousins n stuff.
That said, I doubt the current conservative regime will allow that, especially considering it actively opposed granting such rights during the 2018 judgement (the govt was neutral wrto decriminalising homo *** but was opposed to granting civil rights) |
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ram2001 | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
In gay life high risk is due to multiple partners marriage will restrict such trends as no hiding |
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PrinceofPersia | Posted On Oct 26, 2021
HOMOPHOBIA is common among some people due to lack of knowledge and exposure, religious beliefs, societal norms/pressures like the Middle East. However the ones that make the loudest noise around Homosexuality are actually people who are secretly gay and have been unable to come to terms with their sexuality. This has been psychology proven several times that the loudest homophobes are usually closeted gays who are quite frustrated with their sexuality.
The good part is the slow but steady change. I think during the Pride Month several leading corporates like Infosys, HP, Accenture etc changed their logo to Rainbow colors to represent their support. A lot of companies posted articles on No discrimination based on sexual orientation. There are committees in companies where LGBT employees can lodge a formal complaint if discriminated or harassed in any manner. These actions have made sure people do not look down upon LGBT. There is a long road ahead but change is definitely happening for better. |
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CluelessHubby | Posted On Oct 27, 2021
I have the highest hopes from the current regime if changes are to be made.
377 was written down without much noise.
Why shouldn't a gay partner be allowed to sign his love's medical form?
Why shouldn't a gay partner be the default inheriter of his departed lover's savings- if they spent a life together?
Why shouldn't a gay partner be disallowed to attend their SOs last rites in absence of social sanction?
Why should a straight girl be pushed into a marriage with a man who doesn't want a heterosexual marriage?
Any freedom that doesn't bleed, kill or cut a third person is a basic right for anyone. |
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CluelessHubby | Posted On Oct 27, 2021
From a socio-political standpoint, too many changes in quick succession may as much damage the purpose.
It's been 3 years since 377 got written down.
A change to recognise unions and marriages may not happen anytime soon, but stands the best chance if the current scheme of things is unchanged. |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 27, 2021
377 was written down because of a supreme court decision. No role of government.
If this govt supports same *** marriage, I am willing to be happily surprised. |
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fifty | Posted On Oct 27, 2021
M.P. govt objected to and forced withdrawal of dabar's fem ad featuring a lesbian couple.
Let the hopes from current regime bear fruits.
Just recall which parties had welcomed reading down of section 377.
If same *** marriage becomes legal, it can happen only through courts. That's the only hope.
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letsfuck | Posted On Oct 28, 2021
When India was demanding freedom from the British, the British said indians are.not capable of freedom. They said the religious differences will cause lot of internal fights and civic unrest. Gandhiji replied to thei by saying that ' That is our country's personal matter and business. It does not concern an outsider like the British. They need to go."
When people say the community is ready or not. Gay men are capable of relationships or not is no one's buisness. What people do in their personal lives is nobody's business. Not the general public's nor the government's business.
Civil rights is a fundamental right for ALL the citizens as per the constitution irrespective of ***. gender identity or orientation. If it is not present then we are.not a free country.
This whole argument about LGBTQ community being ready or not is nohodys business. India has been free for 75 years. Have we used our freedom properly ? Not at all. Does.it mean we don't deserve our freedom ? No. Freedom and rights cannot be different for majorities or minorities. |
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Swift123 | Posted On Oct 28, 2021
Legal or illegal
Gay marriage is not loyal in our country orgin..
When *** life got bored it will be irritated soon..
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Kiran_V | Posted On Oct 28, 2021
@swift123 - let's not generalise. all are not always seeking ***. also IMHO if one feels bored with the *** life in marriage, you can open up the relationship. Even people in heteronormative marriages get bored and do it... so why should it be any different for us? As long as u love each other *** wouldn't really matter... *** is not the only value one should see in a relationship. |
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vihit2345 | Posted On Oct 28, 2021
I do not get no matter what thread it is there are always people dragging in loyalty and it is always equated with having *** with one person.
Earlier someone also mentioned the word monogamy which I assume is referring to Physical monogamy (but there are other layers like social monogamy, financial monogamy, emotional monogamy)
When will we learn that it is all about communication and honesty. My husband knows everything (which is discussed before NOT AFTER) and Vice versa and I find it mature but many would rather categorize it as “not loyal” which makes me wonder isn’t honesty better than loyalty?
What he is upto and we love each other irrespective of that given we have so many pillars to hold it together we do not need the physical pillar. We do not give a fck about it but then there is a whole group of people on an online forum talking about loyalty in ones face! If you want to find someone physically monogamous nothing wrong in that but if you think that is the only pure way of loving you are so wrong.
Many of us Think that “ Love is sacrifice” and “you suffer, dont say anything and make it work” but no one ever figured it out that talking as a couple can fix so many of these problems long term (and if it doesn’t maybe you really want different things and should go separate ways sooner rather than later).
Making communicating and life decisions with your partner is what matters in the end, but please by all means chase “loyalty”
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fifty | Posted On Oct 29, 2021
Vihit, great thought very well put.
We have different needs and likings of companionship - physical ( sexual), intellectual, emotional, artistic, dietary.
Now it is not possible that both partners share the dame needs and likings. If I am a vegetarian and my partner is not, I should not expect him to become vegetarian. He has a right to enjoy the food with another person who likes it. If I like movies , dramas and he doesn't, I should be able to go out with other people to watch those. I don't have to drag him.
Same thing goes for sexual needs. I get married to a person for reasons known and agreed by both of us and look for pleasure outside marriage with complete knowledge and consent of the other.
That's how mature, thinking people should be.
We are not getting married to follow the social norms , binding us together in all parts of life. |
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bibotsub | Posted On Nov 1, 2021
what? are you guys serious? it seems I made a mistake getting married to a girl.. |
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Raajiv | Posted On Nov 3, 2021
Yes it will definitely change the situation but slowly..
Like being gay before 10 years from now was big taboo than that of today.. more and more people are accepting and more and more people are coming out because it's legal now.. however change is slow due to our stereotype societal norms..
Similarly once legalised, gay marriages will also be acceptable lately |
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DwarkaFun | Posted On Nov 6, 2021
I hope this would be true... |
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Serenade | Posted On Nov 11, 2021
Legalising same *** marriage would be the best bet for india. Australia has de facto relationship. Pretty most of the western countries had legalised Gay relationship and same *** marriage
India is way behind… this legal aspect can bond Gst relationships also commitment and finding potential partner raises in the gay community of India. Fingers crossed 🤞🏻 hopefully it happens at the earliest.
Peace peace and peace be everywhere |
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17Teen | Posted On Nov 15, 2021
Nothing will be changed. Even if law allows it, it will take loads of years to change mentality of society, and more than that, mentality of gays. Most of whom are *** seekers and aren't diem serious about same *** relationship. |
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Valentine_1984 | Posted On Dec 31, 2021
It may sound harsh but as always truth is bitter. Even legalized or not Indian men in common are promiscuous in nature on relative scale elsewhere in the world.
Be it straight,bi or gay - monogamous commitment is something Indian men lack .
So either legalizing or not, a gay marriage would work only when the commitment towards its is true. Legalizing it may just give a scope for gay parenting, other than that nothing changes.
Can how many of you honest gays tell you didn't have broken relationships in past primarily due to lack of commitment? That's the answer for the questions in this thread |
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decentbottom | Posted On Dec 31, 2021
@Valentine_1984,
Your exactly right. This is something we Indians should work on..
Surprisingly on the other side of the world, we see successful comitted gay relationships crossing decades... |
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fifty | Posted On Dec 31, 2021
Marriage, a monogamous relationship sexual is against nature. It should be treated as a social contract. If one wants to have *** outside marriage,s/ he should be able to, with full knowledge and consent of partner and partner should also have same freedom. |
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Ohji | Posted On Jan 20, 2022
It's already legalized |
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DrGoogle | Posted On Jan 20, 2022
@Ohji
Only *** *** has been decriminalised !!!
( *** *** is not a gay exclusive. Even heterosexual engage in *** *** and prior to 377 was struck down *** *** could be used by women to dissolve marriage. It was not a victory for gay rights alone ...)
This is not however same as legalising Gay ***.
India has not even legalised Gay Civil Unions let alone legalise Gay marriage.
Legalisation of Gay marriage is unlikely to happen in India anytime soon. Prevailing political climate infact doesn't augur well for such change.
Legalisation is only a first step. Societal acceptance is the real goal.
Gay activists are still being killed in Europe where Gay marriages were legalised several decades back.
Many European countries are trying to limit gay rights and even trying to reverse the clock by overturning acts that legalise Gay marriages , Thanks to the rise of far right groups ( E.g. Hungary )
Please understand that fight for equal rights is far from over. In fact current political climate has put hard-won rights in great jeopardy.
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Punebottomm | Posted On Jul 4, 2022
I want to get married to a boy and be his wife...I hope it wil be possible and I'll find one top and loving guy |
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Needfriend45 | Posted On Jul 5, 2022
Even if there is law difficult to implement . Many men are married and do with gays too. Eevn in hetrosexuel relationship marriages become unsuccessful. When i was young i wanted to be with only one man. But whole life was alone only . Many young especially i think need marriage ..just i say all the best . But an easy idea |
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